Monkswood Associates

Introduction
I am starting to review what took place in 2003 and plan for 2004. If you have not done this in any formal way before, here is an approach that I have found useful. I have developed a process I found in ‘Your Best Year Yet!’, Jinney S Ditzler, Thorsons publishers, ISBN 0-7225-3034-X. Some of the developments are from ideas I gained from John Niland (website www.success121.com), who coached me for a while.

When reviewing and planning, I keep in mind the following aspects of my life:

I recommend that you write down your responses as it has more power than just thinking about them.

The review process
So what questions can you ask? Well, here are the ones I consider.

Question 1: What have I accomplished?
“Increasing your self esteem is easy. Simply do good things and remember that you did them.” Author John Roger
I find it very easy to overlook what I have achieved and so this question ensures that I take time to consider my accomplishments. Starting in a positive way re-balances my perception of myself and what I have achieved. It also enhances my belief that I can do things and I’m inevitably surprised by how much I have achieved. One consequence is that I feel stronger and more motivated.

Question 2: What were my disappointments?
“Mistakes are the portals of discovery.” Author James Joyce
What happened, happened. The thing I can control is how I respond to it. Admitting my disappointments to myself increases the likelihood that I can let them go. Be honest with yourself. Try not to beat yourself up as it is a waste of energy. Remember the idea is to learn from these disappointments even if it is that some were inappropriate goals for you (just work out why they were inappropriate in the next question so you don’t repeat them).

Question 3: What did I learn?
What was the secret of my success? What worked? Why was I able to achieve what I did? What didn’t work and why? What would have worked better? What’s the lesson? Have I learned it yet? What changes do I need to make that would make a difference? Which three lessons would make the most difference to me if I followed them in the next year of my life? Remember these when looking forward to 2004. Last year I learnt that contrary to the label I have given myself, I am very good at being persuasive – I just tend to use this skill to limit myself rather than expand my horizons.

Question 4: How did I limit myself?
What has it cost me to limit myself? In what ways have I benefited from limiting myself?

Am I willing to stop limiting myself? What negative things do I focus on? And what do I get?

How can I stop limiting myself? What new way of thinking will counter these limiting thoughts that I can truly commit to?

You may wonder how you may benefit from limiting habits and beliefs - or may be not. I perceive myself as not good at handling turn-downs and, therefore, avoid them and remain in my comfort zone – this is not helpful when wanting to grow my business and myself. In reality, my ability to cope depends on the circumstances, particularly my level of belief in myself and what I’m doing. Sometimes the limiting paradigm/belief ‘I have nothing special to offer my clients’ pops in my mind, which I then strenuously counter as I know there are connections between my limiting thoughts and the areas in my life in which my achievements are not as good as I would like.

What you focus on is what you get. What are you really predicting for yourself, success or failure? Are you focussing on your doubts or your goals? I keep saying that I am no good at dieting and, guess what, I’m not! Looking at achievements can counter some of the strength of negative thinking but not completely.

Question 5: What are my values?
What drives you? What’s most important to you? What values do you want to demonstrate in your life? It might make it easier to identify your top five values. Estimate how well these values have been served in 2003 (you could use scale 0 to 10 with 0 = values not served at all, 5 = neutral, 10 = served well). Your values are your personal principles or standards, your judgement of what’s important or valuable in your life. You need to know what these are in order to ensure that they support your future plans. When you are not living your values, you are likely to feel more drained of energy – hence the importance of getting your plans and values in alignment. You may prefer to focus on your top five values.

Question 6: What are my needs?
Prioritise them and identify your top five needs. Estimate how well your needs are met (could use scale 0 to 10 with 0 = not met at all, 5 = neutral, 10 = needs met). For instance, you may have a strong need for financial security or working with people you like. If this is an underlying driver, then it is a need that you would like to have met.

Planning for 2004
So you have gathered your background information. Now you need to start looking to the future. I find it helpful to clean my mind of my limiting thoughts, prejudices, et cetera and complete the following sentence: “If I could be, do, and have everything I want, my ideals scene would be ….” Write at least a sentence or two on each aspect of your life, describing your absolute ideal situation in life, as far as you are concerned. Let your imagination take over, expanding beyond your present limits. Write down as much detail as you can. One friend of mine even put the colour of hair for his future children and it happened! Now with this ideal future firmly in your mind, start considering the following questions.

Question 8: What are my goals for each aspect of my life?
The categories are: work/career; finances (including material wealth, physical environment and possessions); relationships (family, friends, and other personal relationships); leisure /travel /fun; personal growth/education/creative self-expression; and health.

First of all outline your five-year goals, then move to consider your one year goals. Write any that come to mind, however unrealistic or improbable they may be. Make sure they are not ‘should’ goals – they need to be ‘want’ and ‘will’. Then take into account your answers to the following questions: will I make sure this happens? Am I merely hoping this will be achieved simply because it’s on the list? Am I going to do this? Is this goal specific and measurable? Have I taken into account what I have learnt, including any new paradigms to counter my limiting beliefs? Do they match my values and needs? Do they help me meet my values and needs more than they were met last year? Are they ones I want badly enough to do what it takes?

Question 9: what aspects of my life do I want to focus on?
The following questions may help you to choose: if I could put one problem behind me, once and for all, what would it be? In which aspect of my life do I want to have a breakthrough? If I were able to put a big tick beside one aspect at the end of the year, which would it be? What’s the biggest impediment to my success and happiness right now? Which aspect of my life is the biggest drain on my energy and willingness to go for it in life? Your focus could be on up to three aspects.

Question 10: What are my top ten goals for the next year? For five years’ time?
What’s going to make the most difference to you in this next year/five years’ time? What vision have you started to create? Highlight the goals that are ‘musts’. When you have your first draft of goals, visualise yourself having achieved each of these goals – how will you feel then? Do the goals motivate you to keep going until they are reached? Can you do it? Catch conflicting goals and any lingering doubts to see if you can overcome them.

Some people find it helpful to prioritise your one year and five year goals (greatest return on investment of your time and energy).

Question 11: how can you make sure you achieve your top ten goals?
In a way this is double-checking that these are genuine goals. You need to find a way that will work for you. I find it helps to set monthly targets and review monthly, remembering to register the positive so I keep momentum. Another practice, which helps me focus on my goals, is to review quarterly with someone. In fact you may find it helpful to do the whole process with someone, as they can ask questions, challenge assumptions, et cetera.

Finally, make sure your plan is easily accessible so that you do indeed refer to it!

Conclusion
When I last completed a five-year plan (about two years ago), which was very close to my ideal future, I achieved practically all aspects. The only one that was not achieved was being married to someone who could afford and was happy for me not to work – however, he’s worth it!

You are welcome to reprint any part of this newsletter as long as you acknowledge the source, including full authorship, copyright, and subscription information.

Please ask any questions that the topic has raised, or share your thoughts and experiences with me, Helen Wade, at:

Monkswood Associates
Bankview, Shortwood, Nailsworth, Glos GL6 0RZ, UK
Tel: +44 (0)1453.835263
Email: helen@monkswoodassociates.co.uk